That was a comment I got from my daughter after I came back from a business trip. Even though I did a full grocery shop, cooked a few meals for leftovers and stocked the pantry with snacks and other ready to eat foods, my daughter ran out of food. She also ate at her mom’s for dinner and took packed lunches to school, but nonetheless, she missed my cooking. I think she missed me cooking for her.

I wasn’t gone for long (maximum a week to 10 days); she realized that I wasn’t just a chef, but a housekeeper, the laundromat, the repair man, tech support, the errand runner and of course, taxi-dad who took her to her extracurricular activities.

“I missed you, dad,” proclaimed my daughter. I let her forlorn emotion sink in as I relished the appreciation and the recognition that I am a 199% full-time dad. She did run the dishwasher. Once. But her clothes were a heaping pile of dirty laundry. The house was dusty and she ran out of milk and had to go to the store to buy some with money I left her. She forgot to bring in the mail, but she did remember to turn off the lights and lock the door when she left.

Her friends were the reason why she ran out of food as I didn’t anticipate cooking for more than one mouth to feed.

I never intended to leave my child alone and at the age of 15, there is still much dependence. But I was comforted that she’s mature enough to look after herself briefly. She cooked her own breakfast and texted me a picture of pancakes and sausages. She texted me a picture of ramen noodles with protein and veggies in the way I prepared for her. Her version of nasi goreng with a sunny side egg on top made me proud! Of course, my ex knew I was away and while my daughter spent evenings at her moms, there were times she just wanted my whole house to herself to chill and watch TV or have a few girlfriends over after school. (They were the reasons why she ran out of food as I didn’t anticipate cooking for more than one mouth to feed).

It was a good exercise in independence. Even though I restacked the dishwasher, her helping me with housekeeping chores for years has become a useful habit and skill. She didn’t do laundry, but sorted darks from whites. She didn’t take the garbage out but separated the trash from recycling. And around the house she turned off lights and made sure all the utilities including the gas stove was off.

Keeping a tidy house requires constant work. She realized it and I appreciate coming back to a house that didn’t get trashed with reckless partyers. Like me, my daughter likes a tidy house without clutter. Her room is a different story, but I permit her a spot of chaos in a house of order.