Even after the years of mask mandates, some jurisdictions and institutions like hospitals and elderly care homes still insist that those who enter the premises be observant. There are good arguments for and against masks in schools, too and there’s no shortage of opinions. But the compromise is that if a student is ill, they self-test and stay home for several days until the symptoms clear.

Three days after my daughter’s best friend returned from being sick, she was glad to see her bestie. Thankfully it wasn’t COVID, RSV or pneumonia, as my daughter was still a bit cautious and asked her friend to wear a mask which her parents packed in her lunch bag. But the friend was inconsistent with masking as most kids are. My daughter asked several times and after a while, the friend got annoyed and said she was fine.

Two days after that, my daughter got sick. She was really peeved too. Not only did she miss school, but she also missed her extracurricular activities. Well, there are worse things than staying with me while I worked at home. She had two days to stew over the anger at her friend for refusing to mask up which made her sick. Then I told her that she must speak to her friend when she returns to school. “No dad, she’ll just be upset and she’ll get mad.” If it’s a really tight friendship, then it will survive this conversation.

 

While my daughter has little problems befriending peers, she’s also not in the practice of racking up friends and collecting likes. Better to have a few quality ones than many not so.

 

In our society, sorry does seem to be one of the hardest words to say. That, along with you’re right and I am wrong. They seem like simple words, but there’s so much baggage and ego that most of us feel lesser when we admit mistakes. The blunder may even be small, but the effort to shield our own imperfection is disproportionately large.

A true friendship will survive much more than an apology, I told my daughter. In fact, it must. It is better to find out now that you don’t have it, than to find out later expecting you did. In fact, the measure of friendship is the alignment in empathy, compassion and altruism. If something her friend did that truly irked her, she must speak up. If not for friendship, then at least for herself.

I don’t doubt that my daughter will make many more friends in years to come and some of her closest friends are ones she may not even have met yet. And as she journeys forward, every new friend has the potential to become a lifelong one. While my daughter has little problems befriending peers, she’s also not in the practice of racking up friends and collecting likes. Better to have a few quality ones than many not so.

When she came back from school, I asked what happened? My daughter said her friend was very sorry. All’s good and all’s forgiven? Yup. But probably not forgotten? Nope.