The day I made my daughter spend her allowance
Awhile ago, I gave my daughter one of my old cell phones for her to shoot her own videos. There were rules about this hi-tech toy: no face shots, no taking pictures of people without permission and no taking it outside of the house. One day, we were going to a huge family get together where she would meet up with older cousins who have their own cell phones. She begged me to bring the phone outside so she can show off. I grudgingly said yes. She felt so grown up and had a great time, until the phone dropped on the floor and the LCD cracked. Her shock and disappointment nearly brought her to tears. She asked if she can have a new phone. I said, “No.” She exclaimed, “Forever?” “Not forever, but not for a while,” and the discussion ended.
She didn’t pester me about it because she knew of the consequence of taking the phone outside and not being careful with it. I also wasn’t going to indulge her with another hand-me-down phone much less a brand new one. What would I be teaching her if I did this? That there’s no consequence and daddy will fix everything?
She realizes daddy is not the kind of man who would replace and pay for everything that broke without question; she’s gotta have some skin in the game. I think it makes her appreciate the things she has a little bit more.
Several months had past when I discovered the broken phone in the drawer. I had an idea. I asked my daughter if she would be interested in fixing the phone so she could use it again. But there was one caveat: she had to pay for half the cost of the repair from her allowance. We counted her piggybank and she had enough money to pay for her share of $50. She even suggested that she should buy a hardcover case. She forked over the $5 all by herself. I thought that was a good investment.
We searched on e-bay for a replacement LCD part to be shipped from China. It took 6 weeks to arrive and that was because I didn’t want to pay for shipping. It’s been months since the phone broke; what’s a few more weeks? After it had arrived, we searched YouTube on how to disassemble the phone. Unfortunately the screwdriver set I had ordered at the same time as the LCD, didn’t fit the special screws of that particular phone. A new set was ordered which added another 4 weeks for delivery. Eventually, everything came and she watched me fix the phone. We also snapped on the new hard case for protection. The months of waiting was all but forgotten when she got her phone back. She turned it on and all her old games and videos were still in memory. She was as happy as the day she first got the phone.
To all my friends whom I’ve recounted this story, no one said I was mean about taking so long and forcing her to spend her allowance. In fact, most agreed as I did: she broke something; it doesn’t get replaced immediately. The fact that it took months for all of this to unfold lets her know that there is no such thing as instant gratification. I also think there’s utility in teaching my daughter to fix something rather than to throw it out. And finally, she realizes daddy is not the kind of man who would replace and pay for everything that broke without question; she’s gotta have some skin in the game. I think it makes her appreciate the things she has a little bit more.