Parenting paradox: why good intentions can achieve bad resultsParenting paradox: why good intentions can achieve bad resultsParenting paradox: why good intentions can achieve bad results

Screen time: why good intentions can achieve bad results

In 2018, Drew P. Cingel and Eszter Hargittai from the University of Zurich in Switzerland discovered from their research of sampling 1,115 college students whose parents favored “restricting technology use because it cut into homework time, related negatively to young adults’ college grades.” In other words, parents who limited their children’s use of technology do not correlate to higher academic achievement. In some cases, it had a negative association.

So what’s all the fuss over phone and screen times with the kids at home? Why the push by throngs of parents opting for screen-free curriculum at schools? Justified by the wildfire news that bosses at large tech companies simply do not allow their own children to use the technology they sell, what can we make of all of this? Simple answer is you have to do what is right for both you and your child. Arbitrarily restricting screen time from your child or putting a time limit may not yield the positive results you seek. It could also be a losing battle as even traditionally low-tech schools are now pushing digital learning at home as a way to make up for lost class time. But as more and more content is being pushed digitally, remember that not all screen time is the same. I smile and wonder how much of my job I’d be able to perform if my boss limited my computer time. As I contemplate a future two decades out, my daughter could be in a job that currently doesn’t even exist! No doubt, that job will be surrounded by glass panels of technology with voice and gesture-enabled AI.

In the present day, my daughter tells me that she gets very little technology and screen time at her mom’s house. I asked her how her mom fills her days. She replied with doing homework. All day? No, but several hours at a time, usually doing math. I had a brief and unproductive exchange with my ex about this teaching modality. Doing math to exhaustion is not a good way of teaching. In fact, doing anything rote to exhaustion is never a good modality for a child learning new concepts. While my daughter may not be able to quickly multiple two large numbers in her head, she is solid when it comes to the methodology for doing long divisions, borrowing for subtractions and counting decimal places in multiplication problems. I receive no feedback from her teacher that she is behind and requires remediation. In fact, her teacher sent me exercises from the next grade for her to try. Now, when she does math with me, we focus only on those questions. These questions are actually interesting word problems that require understanding in trigonometry, algebra and spatial acuity! It’s not just getting an answer to a question; these problems require division, multiplication and other partial answers to be carried over to solve the larger problem. In a one hour period, we might only finish 3 or 4 questions! Then we leave it for another day and let the concepts soak in.

Doing math to exhaustion is not a good way of teaching. In fact, doing anything rote to exhaustion is never a good modality for a child learning new concepts. It’s really no different than the way our bodies response to different workout routines. Do the same thing every week, and you won’t see gains. Shake things up and that’s when you’ll see results. Our brains work the same way.

Variety is the space of life, it is so important that children’s education be varied as much as possible. Especially during a pandemic where many of the traditional resources like schools, libraries and community centers are simply not available. We discovered KiwiCo STEM projects are an excellent way to fill a content gap. It allowed us to vary the topics and vary the teaching modality. It made learning engaging, fun and effective. It’s really no different than the way our bodies response to different workout routines. Do the same thing every week, and you won’t see gains. Shake things up and that’s when you’ll see results. Our brains work the same way.

Children’s brains are a sponge. Their growing brains need content to develop sensory processing, pattern recognition, logic and language in both right and left brains. Competency can come later! If you want them to give screens a pause, give them an alternative. Vary the approach. Otherwise, YouTube becomes their go-to-source. Their brain is hungry for content and they will find a source that will deliver as fast as they can consume it. Mindless videos aren’t always a bad thing if it’s done in moderation, so long as they aren’t constantly being broadcast to. Us binge watching is worse! But even if our children are balanced, helps out around the house, gets regular exercise and are socially well-adjusted, we should try to understand why they may want to escape to it. Vegging out is a legitimate requirement. As adults, we find refuge in a book, music, movie or even a cup of tea. We might hit the gym or go for a run as an outlet for our stresses. Children have equivalent stresses (their magnitude may be less) but have far fewer outlets. Alas, the researchers conclude that their “findings have theoretical importance for understanding how perceptions of childhood rules, and the reasons for those rules” should be examined. Ultimately, if we want our children to do well, simply taking the screen away from them won’t ensure it and may even do worst.

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